Let me backup and bring you up to speed over the past few months.
On February 3rd (
the day after I wrote about February 2nd), I went into the doctors office for what I hoped was my final blood draw and final drive over to the hospital. I was so excited of the thought that this was the end! Woooo! That next Monday, just a few days after my blood draw, I got my usual phone call from the nurse.
This is how our conversation went:
Nurse: hey! We got your blood work back. Let me ask you a quick question, could you be pregnant???
Nurse: the reason why I ask is that your levels have increased to 9.
Nurse: it could mean you need some scans or this means you are very early pregnant.
Me: (gulp) is the doctor freaking out???
Nurse: nope, not yet at least. We need you to come in every 2-3 days to get your blood drawn because if you are pregnant, your numbers should double every 2-3 days.
So, I rushed in there that afternoon, and every 2-3 days after that for 2 weeks. This was not a joyous time. I was not excited. I was stressed. And worried. And not exactly mentally prepared to be pregnant, and let alone to find out THIS way. No old fashioned pee test for us.
Obviously, I was brewing something. Every time they called with the results, I asked, soooo is the doctor freaking out yet? And they kept saying no. So, I believed him!! Hahaha if he wasn't freaking out, why should I? The only thing I held onto was when I miscarried, my levels were at 157, 2 weeks after the surgery. I've always wondered what they were before surgery. I was convinced it was a pregnancy, and possibly a very much alive and viable pregnancy.
We had to wait a week after that until the ultrasound. The tech kept saying, don't freak out if we don't see anything, because the range of the hcg is 5,000-8,000 to be able to see something. I felt sooo so sooo sick to my stomach. I wanted to see a baby. And honestly, I wasn't even thinking about seeing a heartbeat. I can deal with a miscarriage. But I can't deal with another molar pregnancy.
So, she pointed out the tiny little speck on the screen as a real, live, heart beating baby. Her guess was I was 5 weeks 5 days along. The best part, when Brinley saw the baby she pointed and said, there is a baby dolphin in mommy's tummy!!! Hahahaha we all died. All I kept thinking was, this is going to be a looooong pregnancy. We have known since basically day one of conception. When we got home I was so relieved but immediately started feeling morning sickness. It was like my body and mind finally connected and I was able to let go the anxiety. Oh morning sickness. I hate you.
2 weeks after that, when my mom was in town visiting, Ryan and I went to my first "pregnancy" appointment for all the jazz and poking. Ry brought his text book and sat out in the lobby :-) I enjoyed a painful examination which told me I had a minor bladder infection and a raging yeast infection. Lovely. The ultrasound tech was out sick, so the nurse or PA or midwife lady said she would do an on the belly ultrasound real quick just to see if the babe was still there :-) and it was.
They wanted me to come back 2 weeks after that for another ultrasound to check dating and viability, so in we went again :-) the tech estimated I was 10 weeks and 5 days along. With a due date of October 13th. Thankfully, it's a Saturday :-).
Over the next two weeks, I was really starting to feel the pains of morning sickness. I had my routine appointment on April 5th during my 13th week. I met with a midwife and asked her plenty of questions. We had a big discussion about doctor delivery vs. midwife delivery, and even though she opened my eyes to the possibility of a midwife delivery, I'm not entirely sold. I DO want opinions about this, but I'll wait a bit when I've met with my doctor and talked it over with him. So hold off :-) We'll get that discussion going in a few months. She couldn't get a clear heartbeat on my belly, so she squeezed me into the ultrasound room and we got to see a cute wiggling little babe. It was amazing. The baby was totally moving around and sucking its thumb and we could see each little finger so clearly.
Baby sucking its thumb! It was so cute!
little fingers!
I have been extremely sick. Well, not your hugging toilet 24/7 kind of sick, but the constant I want to throw up feeling. The worst for me has been acid reflux. It is so bad that I feel sick all day and nothing helps. I have stopped eating anything that has a hint of spice or heat, and have gotten very used to the minty taste of Maalox. Unfortunately, not much has helped. I feel pretty good from the moment I wake up until about 3pm, and then it is alllll down hill from there. I have had a few episodes of only throwing up stomach acid and gagging so bad over the toilet, I swear every capillary in my face popped. Leaving me with splotchy red skin and also around my eyes. Poor Ry never knows what to do.
Brinley is very much aware that mommy doesn't feel well and that the baby inside mommy's tummy makes mommy sick. Which includes lots of Disney channel and movies during the day. When I feel ok, I really try to make an effort and interact and play with her to keep her tv/movie time to a minimum during the day. I'm a bit worried though because she constantly says, I need some water to make me feel better. Or, I need a hug to make me feel better. She always says that and I'm guessing she is getting this saying from me. I must say that a lot during the day!!
Ryan is thrilled about the new babe on the way. He knew it was a successful pregnancy from the start and always was my rock when I was in and out of the doctors office so frequently. He is already talking about my Mom moving in with us when the baby comes because it is right before finals week. I said, how about instead, you drive me half way to Charlotte to meet up my Mom and I go and live with my parents until YOU are finished with finals. hahaha that sounds MUCH better :-)
As for me, I am still pretty much in denial about the whole thing. I can't physically say, I'm pregnant. I just think how excited we were last time and how disappointed and depressed I got when it was a molar pregnancy. I feel like I've already felt baby flutters, but I'm thinking my mind is playing tricks on me a bit. This baby definitely wasn't "planned". But it definitely wasn't a bad thing when it happened. Apparently, Ryan and I are only fertile in January. Go fig. Brinley, the molar, and this baby. All within 2 weeks of each other. Preeeetty funny! I always said, the next pregnancy needs to come quickly for me to really move on. And man oh man, this baby came VERY quickly. I am excited and will be even more excited when I start feeling better.
I am ecstatic to be soon concluding my 14th week and be able to tell people! We told family this past week and they were all so thrilled. I think telling family really made this whole thing more real for me. I think I already look pregnant which is funny because I really don't think I had a baby bump with Brinley until I was 18 weeks. I swear. I just had a bit of chub, but now my belly is like totally round. Very strange, but normal? I've heard that you pop out sooner after your first babe.
Anyways, I am determined to journal this pregnancy more closely because I didn't blog at ALL when I was pregnant with Brinley. I have like two pictures and very minimal updates! So hang in there peeps. I hope you're excited for us!
**Sorry for the quality of the pictures. Our scanner wasn't working so it is a picture of the picture!
